The blog, which was launched by London-dweller Karen Slavick-Lennard nearly a year ago, features the ramblings of her husband, Adam, a mild-mannered Brit who totally Mr. Hydes-out when he starts snoozing. Karen sets up a recorder upon going to bed in order to catch the pearls that fall form her honey’s lips, many of which are laden with four-letter words and condemnations of lentils. The best part is that none of this is related to dreaming. As the Sleep Talkin’ Man FAQ explains, dreaming and sleep talking actually happen during completely different parts of the sleep cycle.
In terms of viral blogs, this is genuinely one of the funniest out there, mostly because it’s honest, strange and entirely unique. Here is today’s sleep talk from Adam – March 18:
“I want to see the piglets. Let me see the piglets. Why can’t I see the piglets? Ohhhh, piglets! …Fuck they stink! I want to go home now. Stinky fucking piglets.”
Below are some random hilarious highlights:
- “I made snot pictures. I sneeze in my gallery, all day. Lots of different colours. Making bogey money.
- “Being horizontal is a state of mind, not just necessary.”
- “Lentils are evil. Pure fucking oozing evil. Take them away from me.”
- “You try feeding me any processed soya, you’re going to find it very hard to wipe your ass without any fucking arms.”
- “Me, fat? Think again, titty-fuck. I taught my muscles to be in a zen-like state of relaxation. Permanently.”
- “Kiss me. Tastes good, doesn’t it. Why don’t you go back and have a second helping? Be greedy.”
- “Of course blue dogs are more expensive. Pink dogs are shite.”
- “Awesomeness now has a name. Let me introduce myself.”
- “Barbie dolls. I’ve got to use barbie dolls. They’re so underrated!”
- “Pants off! Air the jewels, air the jewels.”