Free Lindsay Lohan Update

Posted: 2010/07/29 in Celebrity
Tags: , , , ,

This Lindsay Lohan update is brought to you by the Starbucks Non-Fat Soy Latte and the caring folks at the Free Lindsay Lohan Foundation for Repeat Offenders.

According to various celeb “news” sources, several top stylists as well as hair and makeup people have been put on call from midnight on Thursday through the entire weekend for Lindsay’s release. Lindsay knows very well that the 30-second walk from the jail to her waiting car will be photographed and seen around the world. This is why she is determined to look her best.

“Yes, but what is she going to wear? The suspense is killing me!” I hear you cry out…
When Paris Hilton left prison, image experts choreographed her 30-second walk to her waiting SUV step by step, even down to when she cried out “mommy.” Lindsay’s exit will be no different and it has already been decided she will leave wearing her own brand of leggings.

If you run a jail, and your inmates come out looking sexy, I don’t think it’s unreasonable to conclude that you’re a fucking asshole who isn’t doing their job. Lindsay was there because she broke 800 laws. She shouldn’t come out looking refreshed. She should come out limping and with a tiara carved into her head.” WWTDD

I can exclusively reveal another excerpt from Lindsay’s Jail Diary…
Day 12.

  1. cheneetot08 says:

    lol.. i heard that she’s coming out this weekend.

  2. Paris says:

    lol… I haven’t laughed so hard in a long time. The world can definitely do without her and her ugly leggings.

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