Hey America! This Independence Day you’re going to need fireworks. A lot of fireworks. You need to get drunk and shout, “Fuck yeah!” and then blow shit up. Go to Alabama and see the Bang Bang Lady of Phenix City’s Fireworks Outlet. She is not only the Fireworks Outlet mascot, but she’s also the manager. U.S.A! U.S.A!

It’s also totally safe to visit BangBangLady.com. Seriously.

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